No Kids in the Middle

Description

The number of marriages ending up in divorce has been increasing and so do the children who get caught up in conflict between their parents. Last year, 62,000 children in Sweden had parents who were separated or in the process of separation.

We know that intense conflicts between parents put a lot of stress on the children. While they manifest high levels of stress in different ways, the consequences for the children are often so severe that a potential diagnosis should not be explored until the stress levels are reduced to discern whether the symptoms are still present. The service we have been offering to separated parents and their children so far has not been always adequate. Regrettably, the conflict between the parents may even escalate during this process, further worsening the situation for the children.

In the Netherlands, Justine van Lawick and her colleagues have developed No Kids In the Middle (NKIM) to help children with separated parents in severe conflicts. Children meet other similarly affected children and have the opportunity to share their experiences and feelings related to living with separated parents who are not getting along. The negative communication pattern between the parents is identified and steps are taken to change this to a more positive experience. To achieve this, the network involves parallel child and parent groups which are held over 16 weeks.